condo owners, how do you appease the neighbors?

I have the same problem with my neighbor downstairs. Before she moved in I went down and listened to my stereo to see/hear what was and thought I had it nailed down. Back then, I had Legacy Classics and a 200 watt Rotel amp. Needless to say, it still bothered her when I knew she couldn't really hear it as she said since I knew how loud to play it. Later, I moved on to Decware 1.5s that have no real bass to speak of and she still complained, so I've switched to Decwate MG-944s (haven't gotten them yet) and these should play convincingly enough at low volunes so as to not be a problem. The thing is, since I've been waiting for the speakers, I've had time to hear her (she's a part time actress and talks loudly) and her parties, what with that insipid music that just bangs along like a metronome and it really isn't all that bad. I only wish she could be living below two other neighbors that wouldn't be anyway near accomodating as I've been (I even gave her my number in case it bugged her) to see how lucky she has it. Anyway, I'm going to take the advice given here and arrange to hear what she complains about when my new speakers arrive. Heck, even my managers told me that I went way out of my way to please her and that next time, refer her to them and they'll explain the compromises of apartment living to her.

Man, I guess I am lucky to live in small town USA where houses are cheap and affordable. I can tell what you are going thru would be very frustrating.

I do have one thought. Does your appt. have wall to wall carpeting or laminate flooring? It might not look great, but putting down a layer of that soundproof sheetrock type material on the floor and getting a large area rug might work. This is just a guess.

Or you could always get a crazy look in your eyes, dress real crazy, and go down for a visit and explain that you just got out of a long stay in a mental institution for aggrivated manslaughter when you were 16 and that you don't mind them living there as long as they don't cause any problems. Then scream real loud, sh*t your pants and go running thru the parking lot. I am sure they wouldn't complain about a little music after that. This too is just a guess.

Never mind the neighbors, I live in a house and I am constantly hassling my wife and kids about the dishwasher and my kids about their computer. It is a challenge to get good quiet time to really listen.

Thanks again, everybody. I've read the responses and I have some questions to put out there:

1) Do speakers on spikes really help?
2) What db level would most of you honestly consider to be the threshold of nuisance behavior in a multi-dwelling? I figured 90db measured in-room at 10 feet would be a good guess, but 75db seems to be the limit for me.
3) Will room treatments help? I know they'll make the sound better for me, but will they keep the sound in my living space a bit more?

I don't use a subwoofer.

I like the idea of wwwrecords, but I honestly don't think I could sh*t my pants on queue. Taking a magazine with, and waiting for it, would ruin the whole effect, I think.

Cheers.

Faced with this potential problem, I went the good audio karma/mild coercion route and got my neighbor into high end audio. Then we got his girlfriend into it. They understand when my system is rockin' and I understand when theirs is!