I think you have to be a music lover before you get interested in equipment and the rest of audiophilia. If you don't like music, what's the point?
My wife loves music but was never exposed to good gear until she met me. As our system has improved, so has her enjoyment - her ears are at least as good as mine, and she listens differently than I do, a helpful complement. While she doesn't have the level of interest I do, she's happy that I have a hobby that keeps me in the living room next to her. Since she works a lot from home and listens during the day, she's a direct beneficiary of my tinkering.
My experience is that almost everyone likes some kind of music, and they may not even know what it is because they haven't heard it yet. Find the music your wife likes, play it for her often, tell her how much you enjoy sharing your audiophile interests with her, involve her in your decisions about your system, love her deeply, and cherish your time together listening.
