Best Audio Related Story (or joke).

Why dope the speaker when you can dope the listener. ( That the best f#%#!!! ghetto blaster I've ever heard.)

A lady goes shopping at the local super market. She finds the young cashier attractive. So she asks him if he could he carry the grocery bags out to the car. He agrees. As they exit she wispers into his ear that she has an itsybushi, he replies lady "itsybushi mitsubishi these cars all look the same".

Three audiophiles are travelling across the desert to reach a Home Theater Expo (obviously not this year). They are pressed for time and hire the quickest camels available. And they take off. Two of the camels are making excellent time but the third is making loops in the sand! So he returns to the camel rental depot and complains. Upon hearing the story the camel mechanic has the camel walk over to the pit. He gets down into the pit with two rocks in his hands finds the camel's gonads and slams them with the rocks. The camel takes off like a rocket ship. The audiophile remarks " Wow thats incredible, but now how do I catch up to him?" The mechanic says " Stand over the pit!"

True story about a provincial orchestra in Argentina, performing the 1812 overtue. A trombone player was a tad too effective in entering into the spirit of Borodino and the siege of Moscow. As you would, he put a large firecracker in his trombone, setting it off to accompany the cannon fire at the climax. Good plan, but the firecracker was very large indeed. After the explosion in the brass section, the trombone slide shot through the string section, scattering them like Cossacks scything through French infantry. It then struck the conductor a hefty blow in the abdomen, throwing him off the podium, collapsing the first 5 rows of the audience.
Altogether, a very successful reenactment of the chaos of 1812.

David12, as a trustee of our state orchestra I've been trying to come up with ideas to increase interest in our orchestra and classical music concerts in general. I think your story is just the sort of thing we should do!!

Great story!