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RIP Dad Elgordo

Well it has been a year today since my dad Donald Laby passed away and it hasn’t gotten any easier for me or my family.

My father was the greatest man I have ever known. He always knew how to say the right things when I had problems. He taught me to be an honest, loving, good person, and to always do what I think is right, no matter what the cost.

He was into High Fidelity Stereo and taught me the balance of sound. He was always turning me on to good music and helped me in my quest to become a better musician. I have had many great experiences with music from violin to cello to voice to guitar, tenor banjo, keys and mandolin. I could not have done any of it without his support.

My dad was also a wonderful grandfather to my niece and nephew always opening their eyes to different possibilities, showing them photography and playing them songs on the stereo. He helped with their homework and kissed boo boos. I’ll never forget how he would look at them just imaging their own possibilities.

He showed me the ropes of life to the fullest extent and I know he is learning the ropes of the after life so when I’m done here, he can be by my side once again to help with the next process.

I can’t say how important it is to tell the people closest to you how much you love them.
Just do it. Tell everyone you care about just how much they mean to you and how your life is better because they are a part of it!
mandocarrie
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swampwalker
5,132 posts
 
I echo all of the thoughts above, and will add just one other. Although one year has not been enough time to heal the emptiness, it will come. My wife lost her father suddenly at an early age. He was a great guy and everyone loved him and missed him. He and my wife were very close. The first year or two after his death were difficult for all of us; but especially for her. It has now been almost 30 years; we all still miss him and mourn the fact that he never met our son, or that we never had the chance to share our more recent prosperity with him. However, the pain of the loss has diminished; replaced more with sorrow for not being able to share the things we know he would have loved. So it really is true that time does heal. It takes different amounts of time for all of us and when you are ready, you will begin to remember the great things he gaave you, with a team AND a smile.

We share your loss and admire your courage for putting your emotions out there for us all to see.
cdwallace
216 posts
 
It's never easy to dealing with a lose, be it your own or that of someone elses. When its "your time" to go through, it seems that no matter how hard it is to cope from day to day, oddly enough, its the memories of the years previous you spent with the loved one that keep you going.

I know your pain all too well. Only consolation I have is time and a lot of prayer. Time heals and GOD hears. It may not seem like much right now, but it works if you allow it.

I haven't been on the gon for long so I haven't had the pleasure to correspond or debate with your father. What I do know is that it would make him proud for you continue on.

You and your family is truly in our thoughts and prayers.
I don't know you from Adam, but I know where you are; I've been there before. If you ever need someone to just listen, in all sincerity, shoot me an email!

Craig
zaikesman
3,017 posts
 
I too didn't realize Elgordo was no longer among us, probably because I don't participate myself as much as I used to back when I saw his name with regularity on Audiogon. There are other missing names from earlier days about whom I sometimes wonder where they've gone. I don't think I ever had any direct correspondence with your father Mandocarrie, but I definitely recall having a positive impression of him from the forums. I'm going to go back and search on his name to reread some of his contributions so I can get to know him better. You and many of us are certainly not alone in having our fathers to thank for our interest in music and audio, and in feeling that absence keenly now that they are gone. Thank you, for another reminder that we need to stop and thank them, every day.
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jmcgrogan2
6,346 posts
 
Mandocarrie, my sincerest belated condolences to you and your family. I have much respect for Elgordo, he was a well respected member of our community.

I know it is an overstated saying, and it probably won't help at a time like this, but time really does help heal the scars. My father left me on October 25, 1987. Do I still miss him, absolutely. However, I do find as I get wrapped up in life, work, family, my children, friends, etc, the pain has subsided. Believe it or not, you will eventually move on with your life, as I'm sure he would want.
I smile more now when I think of my dad. I wish he were still here, but now when I have thoughts of him it brings smiles, not tears. Maybe it's beacuse I only remember the fun times, I'm not sure.

Anyway, thank you again for sharing and caring about our lives. Live well and make your father proud.

Peace,
John
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