This is not just them. I've had the same impression at times sitting in Symphony Hall in Boston. Ozawa is now gone, so maybe some new blood will help. But it is not just the Music Director. The musicians have to care
I am very lucky to now be down near Baltimore. New music director Yuri Temirkanov is fantastic. I find I can't wait for each concert to take place. They have everything you say your orchestra lacks.
Temirkanov was asked why he decided on Baltimore of all places. He guest conducts all the worlds major orchestras, and with his stature could almost have his pick of where he wanted to go. What he said was informative. He said Baltimore has an excellent orchestra, but they yearn to be even better. Therefore, it is an orchestra he can work with to attain something. They are open to new ideas and taking chances. He also related that some orchestras know they are great, so they are content, "which is very dangerous".
To give you an idea of the musicians in Baltimore, the principal cellist is famous for being offered the principal's chair of the MET orchestra in NYC without even auditioning or applying for the position. A lot of cellist would die just to get an audition. He turned it down; was not interested in being in NY. A lot of the musicians are faculty at the Peabody Conservatory at John's Hopkins.
I can also relate to the coughing. It is so rude. It is possible to cough quietly if you can't help it. They could at least cover their mouth with something.
You should take the train down to Baltimore some evening when Yuri is conducting.