Do posters intend to hurt the feelings of other members?

Look at it a different way. This forum exists to make money. If it clearly lost the site owners money, it would be long gone. So what takes place to make the site owners think it is worth the bother? Number one it attracts customers. Folks who use, or just READ the threads matter. Since when it comes time to buy something used. They will comes to THIS site to buy it, 100% that is the ’bottom line’So ,with that, what makes the forums worth the bother to READ for anyone wandering the web?
Certainly NOT dull as dust drivel. People, particularly passive readers only, want some level of tension, something new, something to remember, but perhaps not fist fights on every page? The readers, (who outnumber the posters) want to read something interesting. When you permanently kick out, or even temporarily, to the point a lot of folks quit and never come back, you loose the folks who are interesting, who are passionate, and who write stuff others want to read!                   
Even almarg needs someone else to post something to comment on! ..So what level of tension is the right amount? IMO it is exactly AS IT IS NOW. To me more moderating would just make the place dull. Many of the interesting folks who actually answer questions,, start silly threads to have arguments, would leave. Then what? The burden falls on a few. and soon all you have are cobwebs, and no readers. Whom, to me, are the juice, the folks who actually make the place work! (for the owners) are all those folks who never post, just read! If it was more violent, too many would become afraid to post, or just hate the place. So the current level is just fine. Like that favorite drinking place, change even one little thing.. Suddenly the place is empty, Everyone went somewhere else. So for the folks who want to change it to some form of ’safe space’?       
you are crazy.  
LOL

 I have to consider my own thin skin posting here or anywhere else. I choose my words for the sake of discussion, not argumentation. I will almost always lose an argument, since I have not been very good at it. Discussion, on the other hand is something that I have an interest in, whether I agree with the other party or not. I can learn, or even judge from statements of feeling rather than fact (whatever that is). This can be a way to try something new, or realize that you might want to avoid new discussion with that party in the future.

@elizabeth if the reason people come here is for the arguments and incivility then you are correct.

I'd like to think they come to discuss hi-fi and music. Maybe I'm wrong.

Kind of reminds me of the Monty Python skit where people come pay to have an argument. If that's what Audiogon is....well....just as stupid as that skit....but without the humor.

I do not think folks come here for the arguments or the fights. I think those things in a small measure act as a spice to make the place interesting. Also it is a person thing. Some folks who make  noise' are the very same folks who post good stuff. I am certain, if this place was some sort of 'safe space' My az would be long ago kicked to the curb. Just sayin'. Naturally nothing would be lost, since I never write anything worth reading. And it would save me hours of wasted existence....
 

Nothing like meanness and disrespect to draw in the members of a website essentially dedicated to music. 

For my part, I wouldn't miss it and don't miss it on other sites where it does not exist.

Not claiming sainthood here either. I'm quick to be snarky and slow to turn the other cheek. Here anyway. On sites where I know it is not part of the site culture I keep it in check much better.

When I found that I was wasting my existence with FaceBook I walked away. Deactivated the account. Will never go back.

I deactivated my Audiogon account recently too. Was gone maybe a month. Got tired of the nasty responses and my nasty responses in return. When asked why I was leaving I wrote "toxic forum environment".

Is it really that bad here? No, not compared to the majority of other places people interact on the internet. But why does an audio site need nastiness to keep us coming back? It is everywhere else. Why come here for more.

Anyway, in an attempt not to be a snowflake I decided to come back, to try to change what I can about ME and how I respond without expecting anyone else to change FOR me.

And to avoid discussions that have nothing to do with music/audio. 

Still a work in progress. C- at this point.