$100k spent on music and $20k on the equipment or the other way around or 50/50 ?

Extremely difficult, yeah, but with one source and a lot of patience it can be.

Can't be sure of the exact prices and some pieces would very difficult to find, but here is my take on $20k system. 
Nottingham Spacedeck/Spacearm, new or used.
Goldring 1042 or Nagaoka MP-500 cartridge, new.
Depending on tube or solid state choice of electronic:
tube - Allnic H-1202 phono, used; solid state - Sutherland 20/20 phono, new.
Gryphon Diablo integrated, used. VAC Sigma SE integrated, used.
Kharma speakers, used.
Purist Audio cabling, used.

That should do it.

Took me a while, and still a rough estimate, but pretty sure music to equipment comes out even if by equipment you mean..... tone arm.

50 to 800 ratio for me. I have closer to 50 pieces of equipment and 800 albums of music. Is that good? The musics value is priceless and I tell the equipment 'you can be replaced'.

It truly doesn't matter.

View your audio equipment investment as having a kitchen you custom ordered.  Your wine and food are like the music media.

I'm sure you'd enjoy every bit of both, regardless of the investment ratio.